Commercials

I confess. I'm a TV addict. There. I've said it.

I love music and listen to it at work most days. I have a classical music station permanently tuned in on the radio in my truck. Even during times when I find myself iPod-less or radio-less, there's music playing in my head. It's been that way long before the advent of my truck radio --- and way, way longer than my iPod infatuation. But when I'm sitting at home, working on the computer, doing housework, even going to sleep, the TV is on. True crime stories, forensics, mummy autopsies, pyramid investigation, women shopping for wedding gowns, documentaries, even Harry Potter marathons, I watch'em all --- or at least, keep track of them while I'm doing other stuff. I think it helps me keep what brain I have left active and working.

There's a downside to TV too, though. Commercials. Advertisements. Teasers. Each station on my dish seems to have a group of favored commercials and they play them -- over and over and over. I can see the same commercial at least once every half hour for the length of time I have that particular station tuned in. Change the channel and a new set of repeaters shows up. Some of them I kinda like, like the one for a medical show that shows an iguana loose in an ER and racing through a doorway at top speed -- but the accompanying vocal soundtrack gets a bit wearing. I can watch the iguana but the song drives me nuts. I can only watch so many reiterations of Shania Twain's "I was losing my voice and losing my confidence" spiel for her reality show or the like. I will often switch channels just long enough to watch another commercial, any other commercial, rather than the one that's on the channel whose program I am interested in watching. Luckily most of them take commercial breaks at about the same time. Wonder bras, Sham-Wows, endless bathtubs of couples touting Cialis or slick super Bob and his eternal smirk indicating the efficacy of Enzyte or whatever, I can do without entirely.

I wonder what the reaction would have been in Jesus' day. "Back to our healings in a moment, but first a word from our Sponsor." Would people have gotten up and gone for a pit stop or to get something from the fridge? "Dang, we've heard this same message 15 times now. Can't they come up with something new?"

I remember at least one church commercial that appeared on TV that actually caught and held my attention every time I saw it. I believe it was the UCC and hook was that their church didn't keep out all but the select; they accepted the very people society said were unclean, unrepentant and unregenerate sinners and outcasts. "Wow!" I thought. And I wished so much the Episcopal church could come up with something even half as telling and half as inviting as that was. But then, we're Episcopalians. The old joke is that "We don't need evangelism. Everybody who is supposed to be Episcopalian already is!"

I wonder what kind of commercial we could do? "We take the Bible seriously -- but not literally." "Our sign says 'The Episcopal Church Welcomes You' without any 'unless....' following it." "An old church with a message for today." "God and human beings served here." "Asking questions is fine, even hard ones. That's how we learn and that's what we practice." "A church established in 1534, based on a faith founded in 33 AD." "We believe Jesus died for all the sins of the world, not just a few."

Ok, you see now why I'm not some advertising wizard or copy writing powerhouse. But the point I'm trying to make is that we need to put our church out in the marketplace, not to sell it but rather to extend an invitation to visit it. we get lots of publicity over "gay bishops" or lawsuits and the like, and the Lord knows those topics sell a lot of papers and even air time on the national newscasts. Some of that publicity has proven to be in our favor; people who had been wounded by churches who rejected them because of who and what they were, people who had been preached at and bashed over the head with Bibles (figuratively if not literally!), even people who had been turned off by the perception of hypocrisy (like preaching about sin and then getting caught coming out of a cheap motel or arrested for propositioning undercover cops). Those folks have been a blessing to us. They keep us honest and they keep us working to try to show more people what we have to offer.

How do we really get across the message that appears on signs outside Episcopal churches all over, "The Episcopal Church Welcomes You"? What kind of commercial, infomercial or ad campaign would really get that point across? "If you're seeking a honest place to practice your faith, apply within"? "Come let us show you faith in action"? "Feeling lost? We can help you find directions"?

I know what I found in the Episcopal church. It didn't take a commercial, merely a "Coming to church with me today?"

Sure sounds a lot better than even a cute iguana hot-footing it out a door to the accompaniment of some tune that states, "We're gonna make you feel all right."